"Honesty"... Is it Really the Best Policy?

Back in my early school days teachers and parents would tell us that this was the case. Its wrong to lie, and that telling the truth will set you free. Recently, I read a book which promoted 7 characteristics of a loving person's life, and honesty was one of them. Yet in everyday life, we all sometimes, make conscious decisions to be dishonest, "for the greater good".
Last week, a roommate of mine mentioned something on this topic. He stated that, in some situations, you can't win. Here's the example he used. There's a guy(str8) who is going into the dating scene. He can talk to multiple females, and she can too, and its all good. However, if he told any female that he enjoyed talking/spending time with her... that would create a sense of commitment/exclusiveness, in a way. He could honestly say that to each of the girls. Yet, if he told any of them, about a different girl... they would feel betrayed-ish or at least they would react dishonestly. In that they would not be as honest and open, because they'd be scared of becoming vulnerable. Even if, the girls themselves, were talking to multiple guys.
Honesty triggered dishonesty. Another example he gave was the following. A guy is very interested in a girl, so he's honest with her, and puts it out there. She isn't feeling the same way, yet doesn't want to hurt him. So instead of being completely honest, she declines yet says "another place, another time maybe" or "she's not looking for that right now" and then he'll probably say "its ok" or something to that effect. She's dishonest to spare his feelings, and he's dishonest for the same reason.

In life, few things are perfect. Meaning sometimes honesty has the potential to hurt feelings. If someone thinks they can sing. but can't (see american idol). If someone thinks they can wear something that is just too small. If someone needs a reality check... These things can have the potential to just hurt. But honesty is a necessity. Time reveals all truth and time usually also makes the pain more.

Personally, I've been trying to be honest with people, about my thoughts, feelings, and actions. Its been hard-ish and a little wierd. As I sent those emails back and forth to my sister-in-law, I tried to be both open and honest in answering her questions, and it was somewhat liberating. I've also been more honest on my facebooks, and just saying what's going on in my mind through statuses, comment and such, which is sometimes weird. Because people may not always know the full story behind what I say, and they jump to conclusions about the "Why"s. But hopefully I can spot things, or they'll ask questions which can help let the truth out. Which is why I"ll tend to ask questions to people, if/when I see something, rather than guess.

The other day, a friend had brought something up. So I asked an honest question about it. The response I got was very random. 98% of me believed that it was a complete lie. 85% still does. I confronted him about my thoughts, feelings on the issue, and he still continued with saying the same thing. The weird thing about it, is that I don't see anything he has to gain by lying, or lose by telling the truth. Its just a pointless lie. So now I have to make an inner judgement call on do I accept his words as truth, or believe everything else and myself which says its a lie. I choose the latter. On top of being honest with others, I have to be true to myself. But that experience has helped me to look at my current and past feelings, thoughts, and actions and definitely help me to see the truth about certain people and myself.

To answer the question, I truly believe that honest is the best policy. And it is very important in any friendship or relationship. Honest helps develop trust, and if I can't trust someone, why would I want to be their friend? So as I move along, in my journey I'm going to try my best to be honest. I may not always be open and just say everything that comes to mind, but when certain things may bother or confuse me, I'm going to be honest with them about what's going on with me, and I can only hope that they'll be honest back. When honesty is given through/in a medium of love... it can never truly hurt, and we all can handle that truth.